I have never felt freedom more than the first time I whispered “I am transgender” silently to myself.

I was alone.

My house was effectively empty less the loaded shotgun, empty Jack Daniels bottle, and foreclosure notices piled on the floor.

I had managed to scrape together an old 32 bit linux box of mine from way back when, and log into an IRC channel.

I sat on the floor.

I began talking with a complete and total stranger, who to this day is one of my best friends.

I love you Cora.

We exchanged a few messages.


..without thinking..

.. I said it

“I am transgender”

The moment that changed everything


That was it.


The magic moment.

It lasted no more than a second.

A single second.

A single breath.




Life is hard

Now my life since that moment has been everything but easy, I don’t even want to begin to tell you about the harassment I have been through just from saying “yes” to this idea.

But what I discovered was that no matter how hard life is, it’s always manageable when you love and respect yourself.

In fact, my “hard” life apparently wasn’t hard enough. I am now uncontrollably obsessed with mountaineering which inevitably makes my life even hard.

What can I say?

I love it.

I can’t help it.























What is your secret?
























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